I love you, you know this, and I think this revision is much more polished...but...after careful review, I have to admit to my fondness for the original more. There was an edge to it--maybe rough or raw, depending on the adjective list for the day, but it was what caught me.
I think I described your writing once as a painting done in soothing neutrals with a slash of red across it. Unexpected, beautiful and evoking.
That was missing here. And maybe that's just me. But still, very, very lovely.
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Date: 2009-06-01 01:24 am (UTC)I think I described your writing once as a painting done in soothing neutrals with a slash of red across it. Unexpected, beautiful and evoking.
That was missing here. And maybe that's just me. But still, very, very lovely.
**don't brain me**